While Carolyn Hax is away, readers give the advice.
On dieting and resisting food pressure from others:
Ive found the most effective replies to be those that would be given convincingly by someone who was not a dieter and was merely trying politely to turn down something they did not desire. For instance: No, thatll do it, thanks [change the subject]; Cheese Hut? I think Ill pass; Just coffee for me, thanks. If they ask for the extra spoon for a shared dessert, just leave it there without comment.
I dont know where the expression Never complain, never explain came from, but I have found it to be the perfect way to handle this annoyance. Been There
After losing 70 pounds, with 25 to go, others decided I look great so dont need to lose any more. My oncologist disagreed with them. To avoid the stress of a back and forth Take it, No, Take it conversation, I just take whats offered when its obvious my refusal isnt respected. Then, I leave the food uneaten while continuing to visit and enjoy the event. Stress is a contributor to some overeating. J.